My Spiritual Schism

Schism definition means: a split or division between strongly opposed sections or parties, caused by differences in opinion or belief.  The formal separation of a Church into two Churches, or the secession of a group owing to doctrinal and other differences.  Most churches that split, are over other internal issues beyond doctrinal differences. 

Glad I got that out of the way.   

This analogy of my life will be described as a division between my spiritual vacancy, and the split between the forces of evil, against the love of God through Jesus Christ. 

It is wrong to divide a church over personalities, carnality, desire for preeminence, social status, gifts, understanding, rites, ceremonies, or bigotry.   

Dividing over personalities was happening in 1st Corinthians 1:10-17.  Paul speaking: “Now I plead with you, brethren, by the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.  For it has been declared to me concerning you, my brethren, by those of Chloe’s household, that there are contentions among you.” 

He went on to talk about the Cross of Christ should be made of no effect, because of words of wisdom, outside of the preaching of the Gospel.  Not with wisdom of words, but of Christ alone. 

“For the message of the Cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved, it is the power of God.”  Verse 18. 

This being the context, I will share personal “divisions” within the family I was in, and the things that happened which brought me to prison in 1976.  There was, absolutely, no spiritual unity. 

When my Uncle formalized my $250,000.00 bond, to get me released from jail, the process of “paying him back” was in motion.  In less than an hour from my release from jail after six months, the wheels began turning. 

Without naming a name, my Uncle was involved in the “family.”  Better known as the Cosa Nostra, (Sicilian Mafia) was his brand of family back in the early 1970’s.  His biological blood line was half- French, and half-Italian.  He was my mother’s half-brother due to divorce in the family early on. 

He had a legitimate job.  It was as a salesman for a well-known office and school supply company.  He was the head salesman.  This was his front company.  He used this company to hide his shenanigans with the “family.” 

MY job, directly out of jail, was to help him with his used car sales and delivery. 

This is where the schism began for me. 

I was already a drug addict.  Not just any old drug addict, mind you.  I was extremely bent, and wicked, and mean.  This is why I was out on that bond.  Attempted Murder was my calling card at this time in my young 18-year-old life.  Facing a twenty-five- to- life sentence was in front of me.  Court was postponed many times, until my Uncle deemed it was time to face the music. 

My way of paying my Uncle back for all the monies he put forth for my bond, was to move cars around the Dallas area, late at night.  Evil always lurks at night. 

Ephesians 5:11 says: “Have no fellowship with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather, expose them.” 

I did not have a spiritual bone in my spiritual body at this time.  Well, I did have demons from Hell living on the inside of me, if that counts as a bone of contention. 

Schism number one: Take directions from Uncle; move a car (usually a Cadillac or Lincoln brand) at night to a pre-determined location, take the keys and lock the doors.  Then, put the keys on top of the left front tire, and call a taxi.  “Here, Nephew Joe, take this cash I am giving you, and fill up the car with gas, and pay for the taxi.  No paper trail using cash.  Whatever is left over, go and eat out.”  He wanted me to always end up in Downtown Dallas for dinner. 

I am in downtown Dallas at the Cattleman's Steakhouse.  (pre-determined by Uncle) A well-known, higher end restaurant back in the 1970’s.  My tie-died shirt and jeans was not appropriate attire for this tablecloth dining establishment.  I had to wear a suit after my first felony with him. 

The owners, who operated it, knew my Uncle; they let me slide on my clothing, this ONE time. 

I ate my dinner.  Then I would go to a payphone and call Uncle.  He would come and get me. 

Job well done.  Understand that when I dropped off the car, it was in a giant warehouse, somewhere.  My instructions were to drive up to a huge elevator.  Open the elevator door, drive the entire car inside the elevator.  Once the keys were on top of the left, front tire, then hit the number three button for the third floor and get out as quickly as you can before the elevator doors shut. 

Job done.  Call a taxi, go eat, call Uncle.  Simple. 

This was just one out of a hundred different ways that I was used (abused) by my Uncle.  All in the name of money. 

Schism number two: Do what he says, but do not do what he does.  This was very difficult as I was an addict, addicted to everything. 

He was a womanizer.  He was married and had three girlfriends, all at the same time. 

Divorce was looming for him down the road to the courthouse.  Alimony, child support, and divorce settlements did not put a dent in his budget for gambling and all that brings with that lifestyle. 

I was with him, everywhere he went.  Day and night. 

My time to go to court was fast approaching, but he wanted to celebrate prior to my hearing.  I was facing a hellish sentence, but he seemed to have it all worked out. 

We went to play golf.  We went to Las Vegas.  Another story for a different time. 

I skipped out on my bond from Dallas County, without any issues.  I was protected somehow.  Well, I know how.  Uncle played golf with the judge prior to my sentence hearing.  My lawyer, the best criminal lawyer in the state of Texas at that time, also played golf with this judge.  It was a set up. 

Schism number three: Keep your mouth shut, and never tell anyone what you know, what you see, and who you encountered.  Never, Uncle said to me from the very beginning.   

This entire story I am sharing is for a spiritual reason soon. 

My time with Uncle lasted one year. 

I met Uncle in “dives” called bars with thin walls.  These drinking establishments were a front too, but I was never privy to his conversations with the bartender who looked like one of the Goodfellows.  Robert De Niro, Joe Pesci and the like do not compare to the real deal. 

  The Underworld was above ground, except for the ones who broke the rules.  They were underground.  Probably six feet if they were good.  Eighty feet deep with cement shoes, if they were not good.  Either way, they never spoke again.  A corpse can’t talk, especially if their throat is cut, and their tongue pulled out through the slit in their throat.  Called Columbian necktie.  A postmortem mutilation meant to send a message.  “Do that, get this.” 

My spiritual schism began long before my Uncle. (He did get saved one hour from his departure into eternity.  Not a death bed forgiveness, but a supernatural encounter that proved he repented. 

(Another story).

I was divided by drugs.  I was split in two, and separated from society by prison, and county jail time. 

I was ostracized and excluded from society as if I was a leper.  I was a spiritual leper with rotten spiritual skin and disease.  Ridiculed and persecuted by my peers, my uncle, and the system.  The judicial system. 

The reality is, only Jesus Christ can fix anyone.  He wants to save everyone, but our choices keep us in a paradox. 

The root of my schism was the form of Heresy.  I hated God. 

“And ye shall be as gods; knowing good and evil.”  Genesis 3:5, in part. 

My eyes were open to evil, not good.  I was an evil young man and the demons from hell had me in a stranglehold. 

The simplicity of telling you my story is that I was an extremist.  I did more drugs than anyone around me.  I drank everyone under the table.  I hated everyone around me, so I would fight someone, just to fight and see blood.  Hopefully not my own. 

Enter Jesus. 

I know that I know, He rescued me and gave me a second chance at life.  The horror stories I lived through, were my schisms.  My self-inflicted wounds bled and were deep.  Another schism. 

The spiritual schism ended up not divided.  Not alienated.  It was when darkness (me, back then) met the marvelous Light.  The Light of Jesus and the Gospel of Peace.  There had to be a separation of my dark side, and a deliverance from demons, to see the Light of Christ. 

You may not be as insane as me.  You are not a drug addict and a violent person either.  You are just a good, hardworking person who loves their family.  You would do anything towards sacrifice for the ones you love.  You are normal.  That is the normal way to live. 

The problem is that without Christ in your, perfect little world, with the white picket fence and all that the American Dream can produce, you are still in a schism.  Your separation from Christ.  You may not feel that.  You may even go to Church. 

I have news for you.  Buckle up. 

Going to church does not make you a Christ-follower.  Christian meaning. 

If going to church qualifies you as a Christian, then myself walking into a garage makes me an automobile.  It does not work that way.   

Jesus said, “Verily I say unto to YOU, you must be born again.” 

You must.  No options.  Well, there are options.  Reject or accept His love for you.  When you do accept Jesus into your heart through repentance, then the schism of spiritual darkness is removed. 

Get into His light.  He is the Light, that leads you to Salvation in Him.  It is called, “Come unto Me, all of you who are heavy laden and labor, and I will give you rest.  For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.”  Matthew 11:28. 

Your spiritual schism can be a thing of your past.  It can be a story to help someone else who finds themselves living what they deem as the “American Dream.”  Without Christ Jesus as their Savior and Lord, they are living an American Nightmare.  The problem with this “nightmare” is that you will never wake up from it.  It is eternal. 

Ensure your Salvation in Christ by asking Him to take away your sin and your schisms.  He will forgive you for all your rebellion.  He will wash you clean with His Precious Blood.  The Blood of Jesus not only washes away sin, but it buries our schisms.   

 Copyright © 2025 by Joe Wilkins